I’ve talked a lot about the stories and the women of The Unhappy Wife, but there’s something else unique about this book. There’s an AFTERWORD by relationship coach, Anita Charlot! This afterword is special because Anita offers online relationship coaching, so anyone…anywhere can benefit! What follows is the first of her three pages of wisdom.
Kathy has done an excellent job of sharing the different and very complex struggles of women in unhealthy and unhappy marriages. As I read each story, I saw many similarities between what was written and many of the women that I have coached in the past, myself included. The pain, the disappointment, the second-guessing, and the tolerance are all too familiar.
How is it that women find themselves in unhappy marriages? Here are a few reasons I’ve uncovered while coaching my clients:
They are afraid to be alone
They do not know what a “healthy relationship” looks like
They have not yet learned to truly love and honor themselves
They have yet to find their voice
They do not know how to identify the person that will not only make love to their bodies, but also to their heart
They are confused about what LOVE really is
They mistake good sex for love
They rush into marriage for all of the wrong reasons
They don’t feel worthy of someone better
Learning to love and honor yourself first is key to any successful marriage. As a dating and relationship coach for over sixteen years, I’ve seen many women sacrifice their own needs and desires in order to win a man’s affection, or to gain their family and friends’ approval. They are so confused as to what a healthy relationship is that they begin to settle, to second guess themselves and to allow other people’s judgments to convince them that they should stay when they should be running in the opposite direction.